Home is the foundation and should be the safest place. Home is where we get away from overstimulated society. Unfortunately when one is living with a difficult family home becomes hell and the outside world is refuge. Living with a difficult family is worse than working with toxic people. One of the things that help people survive a toxic work environment is returning to a peaceful supportive home every evening. A peaceful home with a loving family is the greatest support system.
Some people are unfortunate in that they move between a difficult home and a toxic workplace. Fortunately with a little patience, planning and time management it is possible to survive living with a toxic family.
Make financial independence your main priority. Whether you are employed, going to school or honing a craft, spend time each day working on financial independence.
Student – If you’re a student and living with a difficult family your priority is passing your exams and increasing your qualifications. Remember to have fun but study, study, study. Education is your ticket out.
Working And You Love Your Job – If you are happy with your job then save and make sensible investments so you can afford to live on your own.
Working And You Hate Your Job—If you’re unhappy with your current employment work on getting a promotion, go back to school or start your own business. Find your purpose and work on that. Save and make sensible investments. Reach out to people that share your interest and network with them online and in real life.
Self-Employed – Keep doing what you’re doing, get better at it, make connections and expand your brand or service. Invest and save. Research material related to your craft and learn new skills that can help you improve your craft.
Not Working or Studying – Start studying or start working. Do something you love. Studying will make you money in the long run. Working for someone pays immediately while self employment may take time before you start making good money especially if you are in a competitive field. Whatever the case is do something because each constructive action brings you closer to financial independence.
Set A Date
Set a date for when you wish to move out of the house and work towards it. However it is wiser to set smaller goals that serve as stepping stones to reach the big goal of moving out. Smaller goals include:
Increasing your level of education so you may get a higher paying job.
Getting a promotion in your current employment.
Improving your craft.
Expanding your network. Meeting new people that open you to new opportunities.
The smaller goals that serve as stepping stones are whatever you need in order to bring you closer to the ultimate goal of getting your own place.
Be patient and keep reminding yourself that your living situation is not permanent. If you fail to achieve a goal take notes on exactly what went wrong and make adjustments. Afterwards simply set a new date for the goal. The goal will be easier to achieve on the second or third attempt.
Diplomacy is a major key for surviving a toxic family. If an argument is not worth it then let them win it. If they make fun of you ignore them. The emotional energy and time spent arguing with them is better spent working on financial independence.
Be Humble But Assertive
Be humble yet assertive when dealing with the unavoidable conflicts that might arise. Avoid confrontation over petty issues but be firm and confront them on things they do that make your life difficult. If all they do is talk negative let them be. However, be assertive if they do things that negatively affect your life. Be assertive and voice your concerns about anything they do that interferes with your goal of financial independence.
Respect The Home
Even though your family is difficult and you dislike living with them, respect the residence that is providing a roof over your head. You might not like the people around you but be thankful for the place no matter how uncomfortable it might be.
If you live with a difficult family start working on getting out now. Not tomorrow but now. If the majority of your actions are constructive you will make your way out.